All About Gender Roles in Society and More

How are gender roles in society, along with other roles and rules, relevant to your and your relationship?

During our prior discussion on interpersonal communication, we pointed out the importance of roles and briefly described what they are.

In this article, we are going to discuss in more detail: how roles are formed (such as gender roles), what rules are, the two types of rules, and how all of the above affect your relationship.

Let's get the ball rolling...

The definition of roles is "a pattern of behavioral rules that are created by a branch of society."

There are two types of roles in society: ascribed and achieved.

Ascribed roles are received at birth (such as sex, race, and culture). Gender roles in society are a type of ascribed role.

Achieved roles are pursued and attained during the span of our lifetime - usually they involve work relationships or our jobs (supervisor/employee, doctor/patient, and investor/client).

Some examples:

Girls are expected to act feminine; guys are expected to act masculine (gender roles in society). Children are expected to behave like children; adults are expected to act more mature. Supervisors are expected to provide leadership and direction; employees are expected to do what they are told. Doctors are expected to be knowledgeable and give sound medical advice; patients are expected to follow the doctor's orders.

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When an individual chooses to communicate beyond the barriers of their specific roles...

Interpersonal communication takes place - which leads to mental/emotional bonding between the two people.

Returning to the original definition, we see the word "rules".

What are these rules?

Rules are recommendations about what are the appropriate (and prohibited) ways of behaving in a specific situation.

There are two types of rules: explicit and implicit.

Explicit rules are those that are boldly and clearly stated ("If we date, you will not be allowed to speak to your ex anymore", "If you quit your summer job, you won't be allowed to go shopping every weekend anymore.")

Implicit rules are implied or assumed ("I never knew you wanted me to quit smoking, you never said anything." "Why can't I spend more money? You never mentioned it before.")

There are many more implicit rules than explicit ones in close relationships and this can lead to major problems.

Often, when in a relationship, we aren't aware that certain rules even exist - until they are broken (such as if your partner comes back from the bar one night at 3AM - you never thought about it before, but it is certainly an issue you are aware of now).

Moreover, when rules are broken within a relationship, it is a sign that more problems are on the horizon.

Now you can clearly see why talking with your partner about the relationship's various rules is not just a good idea for it's success, but a required one.

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