A Dangerous Dating Tip

Lend me your ears...

Playing hard to get with a guy who is trying to date you, making yourself less available than you really are and things like that might be beneficial under certain circumstances but in certain situations - it is a dating tip that can only harm interpersonal attraction.

As a general rule, mind games of any sort can often be beneficial if carried out correctly but there is, unfortunately, massive room for disaster to strike.

Here are two scenarios for using the playing hard to get tactic against two types of men:

If a man is a bit overconfident and maybe assumes that he is so charming that you will no doubt succumb to him - then in that situation a bit of "playing games" could be appropriate for interpersonal attraction.

After all, if this fellow is used to women melting like warm butter when he's around you will stand out from other women by doing the opposite.

Him having to put the extra effort into his pursuing you will make him appreciate any progress he makes and, therefore, make him more likely to appreciate you - simple laws of attraction. But all the while you should be asking yourself, do you really want an overconfident guy who can turn women to jelly?

It is certainly possible, while putting in all this extra effort to pursue you, that he may be tempted by some of the aforementioned melting women and could simply halt his interest in you.

Believe it or not, this is the more positive of the two scenarios of acting hard to get. In order for this scenario to work, you would have to strike a very careful balance between being difficult, yet not too difficult - to the point that he gives up.

The flip side of the coin is if a guy lacks confidence and you still choose to play hard to get. A man who finds that his efforts in amorous pursuit are being ignored, and who is not very confident in himself to start with will rapidly lose more confidence.

It is an easy conclusion for this guy to assume that you are simply trying to avoid him or that you lack the respect to tell him that you aren't interested. This will just serve to drive him away.

Tragically it is this type of guy that you would be better off dating but the playing hard to get tactic would be far more likely to drive away. A man who lacks an over-sized ego would be more likely to appreciate you independently - without need for mind games and would also be less likely to cheat on you.

interpersonal attraction

Believe it or not, the male ego when it is of normal size (or below-average size) is a terribly delicate thing and playing interpersonal attraction "mind games" will often hinder it.

In summary, while there is a chance that the dangerous dating tip could have a positive outcome, it is a very real possibility that it could have a negative one instead. Also, once the damage is done it is very difficult to undo - as the last thing a man wants to hear is an admission that you were just playing hard to get after already being damaged by it.

A dating tip article composed by Richard Ford.